After Rebirth, the Heroine is Consumed by Overwhelming Regret Chapter 50

Jailbreak?
Qi Qing looked at the seamless electronic white walls around her, wondering if the System was joking. There wasn’t even a keyhole; how could they jailbreak? Not to mention the roving monitor sliding back and forth. If they made any suspicious moves, the guards over there would immediately discover them.
She looked at the System, and the System looked back at her.
Then, a voice sounded in her mind; it was the System’s. This was the shared chatroom they used when progressing through the plot in the book. No one else could hear it besides the two of them.
“I’ll cover you. Go towards the eleven o’clock position. When the monitor comes over, figure out a way to hack it.”
“Hack it?” Qi Qing asked, surprised. “How do I hack it?”
She knew nothing about hacking.
“Lightning spell!” the System said. “They haven’t taken away your cultivation yet; otherwise, you wouldn’t have been able to lift such a heavy desk. Inject lightning into the monitor, and all electronic devices will temporarily malfunction. We’ll take this chance to rush out.”
Qi Qing hadn’t expected it to come up with such a method. She secretly circulated her spiritual energy and found her cultivation was indeed still there. Though it seemed very weak, it was enough to destroy a circuit.
The two cooperated seamlessly. Within a few minutes, they had fried the entire electrical system. Then, their cell door became an unlocked sliding door.
The two of them rushed side-by-side towards the command room the System had mentioned.
When they arrived, Qi Qing was shocked.
There were countless screens in the room, each screen displaying a different world. Some were post-apocalyptic wastelands, some were xianxia cultivation worlds, and some were Western fantasy. Each world had a cheesy, melodramatic title, clearly book titles at a glance.
So this is the Transmigration Command Room…
There was no time for her to examine it closely. The sound of pursuers from behind was getting closer. The System pulled her, and they rushed towards the screen belonging to her world. The screen was like an entrance to a secret realm, offering no resistance at all. In an instant, the two of them were teleported in.
Of course, to prevent them from following, Qi Qing cleverly turned back and shattered the screen. Repairing it would take some time. By the time they were found, they would have already finished everything.
The starting point was, once again, the familiar Heavenly Sword Sect.
Only, the timeline was no longer the day she had transmigrated.
Qi Qing could tell because the appearance of the Mooring Platform had changed. It was much simpler and more elegant than before. A change of leadership meant the Sect Master had changed; it was no longer Mo Tao.
She just didn’t know who the current Sect Master was.
The System told her that because this time they were here to find Yu Yan, the timeline hadn’t been turned back. The current Sect Master of the Heavenly Sword Sect was now Ling Aorui. Ling Aorui had probably handled the sect’s affairs before going out to find her.
However, her original self should be dead by now. Yu Yan’s whereabouts were unknown. It was best to go back to the original place to check.
“Direct resurrection?” Qi Qing was a bit surprised. “Isn’t that a bit heaven-defying?”
If that were really possible, the System would be too amazing.
“Of course not. I pulled a few small tricks and changed your identity a bit.” The System took out a mirror for her to look at. Through the mirror, Qi Qing saw that she indeed looked different, like a junior disciple of the Heavenly Sword Sect, familiar-looking, but she couldn’t recall the name.
“There are many NPCs like this. I just grabbed one to use,” the System explained. “Consider it borrowing a body to return a soul.”
Qi Qing nodded and then asked, “Then, will Yu Yan still be able to recognize me like this?”
“Your appearance has changed, but your soul hasn’t,” the System said. “If she can’t even recognize your true form, then she shouldn’t bother messing around in the Heavenly Realm. Time is short, let’s hurry. If the pursuers catch up, we’ll have no hope left.”
Qi Qing was also worried about this and nodded repeatedly.
The person and the system flew towards the Mooring Platform.
The reason for going to the Mooring Platform was, firstly, to leave the Heavenly Sword Sect, one had to pass through several main gates. Other gates required a command token; only this place didn’t have too many procedures or interrogations. Secondly, this body’s cultivation was not high; flying on a sword for a long time was definitely not possible, so they had to find a way to borrow an immortal boat for travel.
If they met an acquaintance, they shouldn’t have trouble bluffing their way through.
With a trace of anticipation, the two flew to the Mooring Platform, only to find their luck wasn’t very good. As ill luck would have it, the one on duty today was actually Ling Aorui’s mean-spirited lackey, named something Li.
“Si Li,” the System reminded her. “She’s very difficult to deal with.”
Qi Qing had experienced this firsthand long ago. But right now, there was no other way. She could only brace herself and go forward, explain the reason to her, saying she was going out on a mission and needed to borrow an immortal boat.
Si Li didn’t even look at her and said, “Token.”
How could Qi Qing have a token? She had run out using a borrowed identity. So she said, “The Records Hall hasn’t given me the token yet. They told me to go down the mountain for the mission first, and someone would come later to complete the formalities.”
“Go down the mountain without a token?” Si Li waved her hand and called the disciples behind her forward. “I don’t care about you. Figure it out yourself. I can’t make an exception for you.”
Qi Qing was pushed aside. She stood there awkwardly for a while, still unable to think of a good solution. She couldn’t just snatch one in public. Even if she managed to snatch one, there was still the Mountain-Protecting Formation waiting.
Just then, someone suddenly tapped her shoulder.
“Follow me.”
Qi Qing looked back. The person had already turned and was walking towards the end of a dim corridor. Qi Qing and the System exchanged a glance and followed, somewhat puzzled.
After walking for a long time, they reached a door. After pushing it open, the light brightened considerably. Inside, it was filled with various immortal boats and magic artifacts, but none were high-grade. They were probably the ones usually used by disciples for missions.
“I’ve been waiting for you, Junior Sister Qi Qing,” the person suddenly spoke. “I knew you would come back. I don’t have much else to help you with, so I’ll secretly give you an immortal boat. Don’t worry, I’m in charge of the warehouse. I’ll just mark it as scrapped, and no one will find out.”
The person beckoned an immortal boat over and presented it to Qi Qing. When they saw each other’s faces, Qi Qing realized this person was actually Skinny Monkey.
It felt like their last meeting was many years ago.
He still looked the same, just not as arrogant as before, and his voice was much calmer. But… how did he recognize her?
“I’ve specialized in training my eyes these past few years. I was assigned to be the warehouse keeper because of my exceptional eyesight. That’s why I could recognize you at a glance.” Skinny Monkey paused, then added, “I’ve always wanted to thank you. If you hadn’t saved me back then, I would have been tortured to death by those people.”
Only then did Qi Qing remember that she had indeed saved him.
But it was just a small effort, really nothing much. If he hadn’t mentioned it, she wouldn’t even have remembered.
“Thank you,” Qi Qing said. “This immortal boat truly solves my urgent problem.”
Skinny Monkey shook his head and said, “No need to thank me, this is what I should do. I bullied you so much, yet you were still willing to save me. That’s enough to show you have a purely kind heart. I can’t compare to that in this lifetime. I only hope to lend you a helping hand.”
Saying this, he took out a peace talisman and handed it to her.
“I refined this myself. Take it,” Skinny Monkey said. “I won’t ask what you’re going to do. Though this item is small, it carries my blessings. Remember to be careful.”
Qi Qing took it, and the uneasy feeling in her heart calmed down considerably.
She had never thought that a small, casual act of hers could have such a big impact on a character in the book. This suddenly gave her a bit more confidence. Perhaps she too could change the world.
“Thank you, I’ll be going then.”
Qi Qing stepped onto the immortal boat. Just as she was about to activate it, she suddenly remembered something. “Oh right, I haven’t asked your name yet.”
“My name is Xuan Feng,” Skinny Monkey said.
“Xuan Feng… a good name.” Qi Qing smiled at him and flew towards the horizon. After flying quite a distance, when she looked back, he was still standing on the windowsill, slowly waving at her.
Qi Qing took a deep breath and flew towards the alleyway from before.
A few days had passed since her suicide. She didn’t know if Yu Yan had left that place. Although she had tried using a person-finding spell, she received no response. Then she remembered Yu Yan had thrown away all communication devices before leaving. So she could only use the clumsy method of going there directly to search.
Not to mention the arduous journey these past few days. When she arrived, the place was empty. The alley was quiet. Qi Qing walked through it several times and found there were indeed no more barriers, as if they had been dispelled.
So, where had Yu Yan gone?
The System reminded her, “Did she go back to the temple? Weren’t you dead? She’d have to arrange your burial. She definitely needed to find a place for that.”
Hearing the words “Weren’t you dead?” Qi Qing felt a bit uncomfortable. She held it in for a while before saying, “Can’t you put it another way? That sounds so unlucky.”
The System said, “What’s lucky or unlucky about it? You didn’t really die. Maybe Yu Yan is wearing mourning clothes and holding a vigil for you right now. If you go earlier, you can stop her from grieving sooner.”
Qi Qing couldn’t help but chuckle at the thought of that scene.
People say mourning clothes can make one look strikingly beautiful. She wondered what Yu Yan would look like in white hemp mourning clothes. Perhaps upon hearing her voice, Yu Yan would turn around with tears in her eyes and rush into her arms in disbelief.
Then, at last, the lovers would finally be together.
With this thought in mind, Qi Qing could barely suppress her excitement. She set the immortal boat’s speed to maximum. She was almost certain Yu Yan had returned to the temple. And now, Yu Yan was waiting for her rescue.
Faster… even faster…
It was the first time she had experienced the feeling of an arrow-swift heart homeward bound.
When she reached the temple gate, sure enough, two large sheets of white paper were posted. This signified a funeral. Many worshippers were quietly offering condolences at the entrance. Faint sounds of crying came from inside the temple. They sounded like the young disciples.
That made sense. With her, the divine envoy, gone, the children would surely cry. Qi Qing found it a bit amusing. She wondered if she revealed her identity upon entering, would she scare them.
She followed the paper offerings inside, all the way to the backyard, where she smelled the choking scent of burning incense. She coughed twice, fanned the scent away a little, thinking that with such a strong smell, the coffin must be placed in the rear hall.
The rear hall…
She slowly approached and saw there was indeed a coffin. A person was kneeling in front of the coffin, dressed in plain white, with a thin figure.
Her heart skipped a beat. Qi Qing looked closely and realized she had overreacted. This person was Jiu Chan, because two fluffy ears were visible.
Qi Qing inexplicably breathed a sigh of relief. She walked over and patted the other’s shoulder. “Hey, surprise! I’m back!”
Jiu Chan slowly turned her head. For some reason, there was no trace of joy on her face. Qi Qing thought she hadn’t recognized her and said again, “You don’t recognize me? It’s me, I’m Qi Qing!”
“I know you’re Qi Qing.” Jiu Chan’s eyes were still filled with tears, her voice was hoarse, not like her usual self at all. “But why did you come back? Since you could come back, why didn’t you say so sooner?”
She said all this, but Qi Qing didn’t understand at all and said, “What are you talking about? Did something happen?”
At this point, Qi Qing suddenly had a bad feeling. This feeling was so strong, it was as if it instantly gripped her throat.
Right, why haven’t I seen Yu Yan?
She heard herself ask, trembling, “Where’s Yu Yan?”
Jiu Chan burst into tears. “She’s dead!”
“Why didn’t you say you could come back? She saw you die and killed herself too! Qi Qing, why did you lie to her? Why didn’t you make it clear you could be reborn!”
Qi Qing’s body froze. She let Jiu Chan shake her repeatedly but felt nothing. How could this be? Back then… back then she had clearly said she would try her best to come back… Although, she hadn’t known if she could actually return, but…
But…
Yu Yan, why didn’t you understand! I’m not worth you doing this, I don’t deserve you!
After I died, couldn’t you have found another young, beautiful immortal lord with a clean past?
I’m sorry, A-Yan…
The harsh words spoken to make Yu Yan live on, Yu Yan had taken them seriously. Unwilling to accept a life without her, she had chosen to enter reincarnation together.
…
Qi Qing had experienced the pain of death, but she hadn’t known that there were things in this world more painful than death. She looked at the coffin, trembling, the coffin she thought held her own body.
Inside the coffin, their two bodies were leaning against each other.
Sharing a quilt in life, sharing a tomb in death.
Qi Qing collapsed before the coffin, heard her own heartbeat growing faster and faster, her breathing becoming more difficult. She bent over, gasping for air. Jiu Chan was still saying something, but tears of blood slowly streamed from her eyes.
She couldn’t see.
The sudden blindness seemed to lessen her pain slightly. But this was only seemingly so. She just couldn’t see Yu Yan’s body anymore, but before her mind’s eye, scenes of her time with Yu Yan kept replaying.
She only now realized there were so many details.
Yu Yan had secretly watched her many times: when she was earnestly practicing her sword, when she was cooking and tasting food, when she was contemplating life. At those times, she had only been focused on what to do about the future and how to reconcile with past hatreds—all grand, empty things. She had never looked back at the person who smiled at her so gently.
When did Yu Yan start to like her?
Qi Qing didn’t know. She only knew it was earlier than when she had started liking Yu Yan. Liking someone sometimes doesn’t have a definite sign. It’s just that at some unknown point, one’s gaze lingers on their face. Even doing nothing, one feels happy.
As for her, it was initially just because she was moved.
Because she saw her own shadow in Yu Yan, she cherished it exceptionally. What she cherished wasn’t Yu Yan’s love, but the self who had once given so much.
She still didn’t dare to admit it, repeatedly saying “I like you, I like you,” as if trying to convince herself. In reality, who was she trying to convince? It was the people who had failed her in the past.
And now, Yu Yan had truly died for love of her.
She could no longer deceive herself, no longer pretend not to know. Her eyes couldn’t see, but she saw even more. She understood the difference between herself and Yu Yan. Yu Yan’s love for her was true, while hers was shallow, meaningless love.
Even her suicide, leaving the chance of life for Yu Yan, was also to repay a debt of gratitude, to have a clear conscience. Wasn’t this also a form of selfishness?
She had wronged Yu Yan; she had harmed Yu Yan.
But she no longer knew how to make amends.
Wait for reincarnation? How could she be sure that the reincarnated Yu Yan would still be the real Yu Yan?
Before she could sort out her emotions, people from the Transmigration Command Center arrived. The System said something to them; in short, it bought her some time.
At least, enough to let her send off her lover.
Seeing her pitiful state, they agreed.
On the day of the funeral procession, she was in a daze, following behind the crowd, stumbling her way to the graveyard. The sound of the young disciples crying was in her ears. Only then did she realize they weren’t crying for her, but for their master.
Xue’er cried especially pitifully, repeatedly chanting the Soul-Pacifying Art Yu Yan had taught her—that was the only spell Yu Yan had taught her. Qi Qing heard her voice as she turned to look, filled with resentment and indifference.
“If only I hadn’t given Master to you back then.” Before leaving, she walked up to Qi Qing and said word by word, “At least, I wouldn’t have lied to her.”
Qi Qing’s heart trembled, and she collapsed to the ground.
Someone came to help her up, but she shook them off, saying she wanted to be alone with Yu Yan for a while. The person didn’t insist, only saying they would come for her after dark.
So, Qi Qing was left alone in the graveyard.
She didn’t feel scared. She muttered to herself for a long time; even though she knew Yu Yan couldn’t hear, she couldn’t help it. She suddenly felt very lonely. Yu Yan was gone. Jiu Chan would soon return to the Heavenly Realm. In this world, there was no one left for her to talk to.
“What a failure I am…”
She sighed, and the sound of rumbling thunder reached her ears.
It was about to rain, but she was all alone.
Qi Qing even thought recklessly, If only I could be struck dead by lightning. Then she wouldn’t have to endure this torment any longer. But the lightning didn’t strike her. After a few rumbles of thunder, raindrops began to fall, pattering down.
There was no place nearby to shelter from the rain, and Qi Qing didn’t intend to hide. She let herself get drenched, a sentence echoing constantly in her mind.
Perhaps, I should kill myself again.
The System had been taken away anyway. No one would help her cure her eyes. Sooner or later, she would follow Ling Aorui’s old path.
But she wasn’t the protagonist; she had no heaven-defying abilities.
Besides, there was no need to be strong anymore.
She fumbled for her sword, thinking, It won’t hurt. I’ve died so many times. This one more time won’t make a difference. But for some reason, she still shed tears, for her life, so full of failures.
She was the second daughter in her family, an older sister above, a younger brother below. As the middle child, she had never felt cared for. She relied on herself for education and work. Lived to thirty, had never been confessed to, all her secret crushes ended without result. In the end, she died working overtime at her job.
At that time, she had even felt a sense of liberation.
Now, she was truly going to be liberated.
Whether in reality or in this virtual world.
At least, she had felt loved once. That was enough.
Just as she was about to draw her sword, suddenly, the rain above her head stopped. The raindrops splattered on the surface of an oil-paper umbrella and then fell by her feet.
Someone was holding an umbrella for her.
“Who?”
“Me.”
Qi Qing recognized her voice. After a moment of silence, she said, “You don’t need to hold an umbrella for me. It’s not necessary. Anyway…”
Ling Aorui interrupted her. “I’m leaving soon. Before I go, I wanted to see you one last time.”
“Where are you going?”
“My identity has been exposed. Jiu Chan will take me to the Heavenly Realm to be punished. So, I don’t have much time left.”
“Oh. Did you come to me because you have something to say?”
“No, I’m here to return something to you.”
Qi Qing didn’t understand what she meant. Just as she was about to ask again, she suddenly heard a squelching sound, like a hand being thrust into slime. Then, she felt something being brought close to her face—bloody, warm, and slippery.
Ling Aorui pressed something into her eyes.
Soon, Qi Qing understood what it was.
They were a pair of eyes.
The eyes she had exchanged her entire lifespan for, given to Ling Aorui.
When she opened her eyes again, her vision cleared, as if it had never been so clear. Her body also seemed to be undergoing some change. It seemed her cultivation was advancing by leaps and bounds, uncontrollably.
“What is this…?”
“From now on, we probably won’t see each other again. I’m returning your eyes to you, along with several thousand years of cultivation. Now, we don’t owe each other anything.”
Ling Aorui smiled faintly. Her eyes became unfocused again, looking a bit like how she looked when they first met.
Before Qi Qing could reply, the other said goodbye and fumbled her way back. But the ground was slippery after the rain, and she had given the umbrella to Qi Qing, so she walked with considerable difficulty.
Qi Qing suddenly felt a pang of pity. After hesitating for a moment, she said, “Wait, I’ll walk you back.”
Ling Aorui stopped and said hesitantly, “Is that alright?”
“It’s the last time anyway,” Qi Qing said.
The story of these few people ended here. Whether love or hate, let it all gently fade into the martial world.
Ling Aorui walked for a while, holding onto her arm. Suddenly, she said, “I have something to say, though I don’t know if I should. I know I don’t have the right to say this, but… regardless, I still hope you can continue to live.”
“Maybe there are other ways. There are so many divine artifacts in this world; you might not be at a dead end. I remember the Myriad Flower Palace has many magic tools. Go take a look. If it doesn’t work out, it’s not too late to seek death then.”
Qi Qing was stunned. She hadn’t expected Ling Aorui to be so perceptive. Just as she was about to refuse, suddenly, a lightning-bolt idea appeared in her mind.
No… that’s not right…
She couldn’t die yet, they still had a way out!
Qi Qing abruptly stopped walking. Ling Aorui was a bit surprised and couldn’t see her expression, so she asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Do me a favor.” Qi Qing said resolutely. “I need to dig up Yu Yan’s grave. Right now!”